Ben Affleck: Staying In Rehab Is For Poor People

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Ben Affleck: Staying In Rehab Is For Poor People


Wealth and fame can certainly help to insulate you from the many perils and pitfalls of life, but no one among is completely immune to suffering.


Not even the mighty Batfleck, who’s currently learning the hard lesson that kicking an addiction ain’t easy, even if you’re super rich.

Ben Affleck Smiling


As you may have heard, Ben Affleck checked into rehab for the third time last month.


And this was no mere sobriety tune-up either.


The decision to seek treatment came on the heels of an epic bender and an intervention staged by Jennifer Garner.


You know the situation is bad when your estranged wife you seems to want nothing to do with you feels the need to swoop in and save your life.

Ben Affleck Looks Pissed


Anyone who’s seen the photos of an exasperated Jen driving Ben to rehab (after a quick stop at Jack In the Box, of course) knows that this is not a woman who was enjoying the view from atop her high horse.


She acted on behalf of her children because she really thought their dad might die.


Anyway, you might assume that under such dire circumstances, Ben would treat his recovery as a matter of life and death and devote all of his energy to the hard work of getting sober.


Sadly, you would be wrong.

Ben Affleck Looks Shady


You may have heard the many reports about Ben leaving rehab.


And you may have been confused by the subsequent reports about Ben returning to rehab.


You’re right to be baffled, as no one has ever done rehab like this in the history of rehab.


As it turns out Ben leaves the facility several times a week in order to work out at his home gym.

Ben Affleck, Post-Divorce


He then heads back to the treatment center in time for lights out.


It’s worth noting that during his time at home Ben is usually visited by Shauna Sexton, his 22-year-old Playboy model girlfriend.


Gosh, we hope those visits don’t cut into his workout time.


This is a man who needs regular physical activity!

Shauna Sexton Photo


The extent to which Ben is half-assing what was supposed to be a life-saving rehab stint is so ridiculous that it’s hard to believe.


But folks, this is no mere tabloid gossip — earlier today, Ben’s reps essentially confirmed that he spends the lion’s share of his “treatment” time just chillin’ out at home.


“He has a specialized program to suit his needs — meetings, working out, reading, therapy,” a source close to Affleck tells People magazine.


“Everyone’s journey with addiction and treatment is different and built for the individual. [Affleck’s] is a good mix of mental and physical work. This is what was outlined by his doctors and team

Ben Affleck With Daughters


“He recently put in a gym at his home and is most comfortable there,” adds the insider.


“Ben continues to work hard on himself and is committed to his rehab program, which includes a daily routine of multiple meetings and indoor and outdoor exercise”


Folks, Ben hasn’t been this thoroughly coated in BS since the last time he put on the Bat Suit.


(That joke sounded a lot better in our heads.)

Surprised Ben Affleck


Ben’s team wants us to believe that his doctors really think it’s a great idea for him to head home every afternoon so he can “work out” with his girlfriend.


Funny, we thought patients in rehab were generally encouraged to, ya know … stay in rehab.


We kid, but this has gotta be seriously discouraging for the many people who are relying on Ben to get and stay sober.


We wish him the best of luck … but we can’t help being a bit skeptical.



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